Thank you Tyson Fury for helping me from a distance these last two weeks. Thank you to you, too. I appreciate it. Sports are going on this weekend. Oh yeah, they are but first a quick note to the Gypsy King. Not only am I thankful, I’m proud of you, Mr. Fury. Your life story is a testament to love and the great heights men can climb, despite facing brutal valleys.
NFL PICKS
Dolphins at Jaguars (London Game): We love giving the Brits these games. I want to say gross but it’s so gross that it might be good. It’s going to be football, just not from two necessarily in-form teams. There will be competition and I’ll be watching. So gross it’s beautiful. Nothing is bad, just misunderstood. Dolphins because I think their secondary shows heart.
Vikings at Panthers: The Vikings have been weirdly competitive this year. JJ is always open. I don’t think it means I trust Kirk but it’s definitely a situation to monitor. They put up points. The Panthers were ugly last week. It felt like it was coming. With CMC out again, I don’t know how I could bet against the boys from Minnesota. I say it with my hands in my pockets looking at the ground but Vikings by three.
Chargers at Ravens: Lamar is undeniably a rush to watch. He’s just a big play. On the other hand, Herbie continues to make the right plays at the right time. Reminds me of Tom in a way. I think it’s just too tough to get a win in Baltimore. Last week proved that. Ravens dub.
Rams at Giants: I feel for Saquon, that was just unfortunate. I hope it’s something minor and that he comes back at 100%. The injury was just happenstance but I do feel like he’s being rushed back. Rams are going to roll them but, you know how things are, it will be close. I just feel like going coast to coast and the weather and Stafford’s finger...am I feel an upset? I’ll go with the big favorites.
Texans at Colts: Fuck it I think Mills could be good. He hasn’t really blinked. Colts can’t be trusted with the play calling. Texans claw out a win.
Chiefs at Washington: Yay, another NFC East team to soothe our egos. Chiefs by 7 but this isn’t looking good.
Packers at Bears: Rodgers loves playing in the Windy City. Da Bears don’t shake him. An easy 27-33 290 yards 3 touchdown game on the way. Packers winners. Yes.
Bengals at Lions: I wanna get swifty, yeeeeah, cmon and gets swifty. Coach Campbell might have ptsd but I think he can coach a football team. Lions beat the bungles.
Cardinals at Browns: The Browns are without Nick Chubb and I feel like the defense is showing some weakness. Cardinals have made some moves getting Ertz. I think that the organization as a whole is full of confidence. Birds win by a touchdown.
Cowboys at Patriots: This game comes down to which Patriots team shows up. Against the Bucs they showed a lot of tenacity but other weeks they fall flat. I can see the Cowboys losing just because I can’t take them seriously, no matter how well they play. My gut tells me that the Patriots will win this one. It’s Foxborough.
Raiders at Broncos: Finally the world caught up to the fact that Jon Gruden is an asshole. I’m not surprised by any of it. Broncos might be without Bridgewater but I still trust that run game and front 4. Broncos put the nail in the coffin of the Raiders hype train.
Seahawks at Steelers: Geno Smith is at the helm for the Sayowks this weekend. Last week I feel like I saw some consistency out of Ben. I think people want to bury him too soon. Him and Tomlin can figure things out and Najee is great. Steelers by a couple of points.
Bills at Titans: Josh Allen is a force of nature. He’s improved so much since his rookie season. McDermott has known exactly how to utilize him. On the other hand, it’s beginning to be Tractorcito season. I could see the Titans making this a close ball game but the most likely situation is that the Bills stomp them.